We almost didn't get a second pitcher, but now we're getting a sixth.
when a girl feels in her heart, the way she feels in her vagina, anything is possible.
Well, my mom brought up me being vague about losing my license and she gave me the intervention look. so i left before they could bring out their heartfelt letters...
Just stuffed an entire cupcake in my mouth after finishing third glass of wine. Valentines day is pretty much going how i expected it.
My printer just jammed because one of the condom wrappers I threw when we had sex in my dorm
all i remember was you yelling "look at my little feet" at everyone on the way home from the bar.
He is now the second fuck buddy that i have met by walking up and grinding on him. My ass is so much more productive than dating
I don't think my prof knows we've noticed her No Bra Fridays.
Having boobs is probably the greatest thing in the world, free booze all around
Judging by the ckaw marks on my back i'm gonna go out on a limb and say that blonde chick was a werewolf. A sexy, kinky werewolf.
Did I let your boyfriend smear a banana into my face last night? Because I have pictures that are telling me I did....
Leave it to you to bring a trash can into a fist fight.
After last night I am convinced that you are the human embodiment of alcoholism and bad decisions.
Nana added me on facebook...i think i'll have to call her and warn her about my lifestyle before i confirm her as a friend.
Did we go to Florida? My missing thong and DL just arrived in the mail. Return address was Tampa.
Randomize
