I think scott just propositioned me for sex
Oh and ps....i was sleeping soundly until i woke up by the sound of amy on the phone with her mom sobbing hysterically because she can't stop having the shits.
Dude she has the ugliest blow job face ever.
Going to get a "plan B"urrito
We woke up under the ping pong table holding hands.
Don't worry we will all be making bad decisions soon
That's the most comforting thing I've heard in months
Please acknowledge the sock on the door. If not it will be rammed up your ass.
we shared soup. that is literally the extent of my romantic life right now
theres 2 cans of open Campbell's soup on the counter and a note that says "guess which one is puke" ... want lunch?
He just pulled out my weave during sex....needless to say I'm embarrassed and in need of another shot pronto
All I know is that at 4 am I was walking down the street in my bra and his shorts and Im pretty sure I passed my grandma on her morning walk.
Everyone is coupling up and I'm just excited the bartender gives me enough attention to order more shots.
WHAT IS ALL THIS WATER BOTTLE FLIPPING NONSENSE? WHAT IS LIT?
YOUTHS.
You were in the girls bathroom yelling at some random chick because you thought she stole all the urinals. That's why you were kicked out.
Did I tell you I’m going on a date? His name is Michael and we both like dinosaurs and anal.
Randomize
