Omg. Just talked to a semi driver from nebraska. Got her truck stuck. Gave her and her riding buddy a glass of vodka and a cig. YES.
Getting drunk in a different country is not a good idea. Lets just say spanish women, 17 yr olds from missouri, prostitutes, and a poodle. I don´t want to leave spain.
did we hook up?
no, because you kept repeating "itty bitty titties" when i took off my shirt
if you were to get worldwide popularity from playing guitar with a plastic yellow bat while drunk on YouTube, would you hate me?
they have pregnancy tests at the dollar store
I feel like that is one of those things that you should not cheap out on.
This is going to be the summer remembered forever as the giant 3 month long mushroom trip.
when we went to bed he asked me to hold his penis so he knew i was there for him
I did a hand stand against the glass wall at Ziggy's with no panties on and got 3 phone numbers. Thank God I shaved this morning...
The neighbors outside are screaming at one another about God knows what and everyone is too scared to go outside and we NEEd more beer
It took years to build this empire of casual fuckings and not carings.
I found them in the bathroom trying to wrap an American flag around Steve's dick. I didn't bother to ask questions.
The date went significantly better after the fifth shot of fireball.
The guy I hooked up with two weeks ago just friended me on Venmo, I honestly won't be mad if he pays me for the sex
I couldn't have possibly been that bad
You had her flip the penny over to the lucky side before you picked it up and ate it...
I gave in, made out with her, and long story short, I'm giving hetero another try.
Randomize
