its not stalking. its research.
I feel like this woman may give her husband a hand job mid way through dinner. just saying.
Note left in log book: "4:30am a guy was caught masturbating in the bathroom and passed out in his own juices and we had to take the door off the hinges."
You guys are open that late?
you guys are cousins why the FUCK are your pants off
y-o-u-r-e = you are, y-o-u-r = your. you are a bag of douche not your bag of douche. if you're going to insult me at least do it in proper english. that is all.
She went home with him because he works at Jimmy John's and his car "smelled like meat"
Unless you have figured out how to blow me through the phone don't drunk dial me.
I'm looking at some sugar baby profiles to get some insight on what we're up against.
I was smelling my bathroom to make sure it didn't reek of weed...I spaced out and realized I was face to the wall sniffing it for 5 minutes.
I built a fence. For the bunnies we're going to adopt. I'll fill you in when you get home.
I have a present for you
Like a legit gift, not just me showing up and getting naked
He kept singing Happy Birthday to himself, yelling at the bouncers for not letting him in, and telling them his "father will hear of this." He was like a drunken Scottish Draco Malfoy.
I just realized I haven't got laid since the last time the Browns won.
Today I had sex and flossed at the same time. My relationship goals have been exceeded.
Wanna go get tea? Warning: I will be high in an hour.
Randomize
