Joe is a total sociopath, I'm going to hook up with him tonight
youll never guess who i didnt fuck at that party
I made myself breakfast and everything and then whoever's house it actually was came downstairs very upset.
We just took shots out of seashells. Welcome spring break 10.
He said he wanted to have kids with me so they could grow up to be professional linebackers. Not. A. Complient.
Is it obsessive that I keep picking my crazy sex rug burn scab so it leaves a scar I can remember him by?
Its official. Girls from Indiana do not give rim jobs.
Now he's trying to use the tornado warnings as an excuse to get head. Yeah, b/c THAT'S the last taste I want in my mouth b4 I die...
Typical Sunday afternoon purchase of condoms and a helium tank.
you kept introducing yourself to guys as "never going to happen"
Public service announcement: if you would like to continue receiving blow jobs, a 25% increase in fuck-giving will be expected immediately, and you're expected to give an actual flying fuck at least once a week. Brought to you by the ad council.
...I think i just fell in love with a random undergrad at first glance. He was the awkward young adult version of captain hook. Dear god i need to get off this campus.
He showed me a picture of his baby hamsters and I called them "Mammal McNuggets"
Meh, all I have to do tomorrow is proctor an AP test. No loud noises and no physical activity allowed for almost 4 hours. Sounds like the perfect recovery period for a hangover.
Please note that in response to your post about your dog's jaws clamped hard around a stick, I did not comment, "Takes after his dad." You're welcome.
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