Our Neighbors are trying to steal our ducks!
I can't believe you blew on her face.
I feel that every long term relationship needs at least one big,load delivered straight between the eyes.
I wish I could google chicago male strippers on my work computer but I don't feel like talking to HR today
She's not depressed. She's just sober. It's like the same thing.
you kept naming everything at the party...like "boy i'm going to make out with" and "table i'm going to dance on later"
Somehow "stranger danger" turned into making out with a 25 year old on burbon street.
I was lying there too hungover to move when my dog jumped onto my bed and set half a calzone on my pillow. Best. Dog. Ever.
Last thing I remember is beer bonging sangria. Dear God.
He thought my hair would soak it up. I HAD TO CUT IT OFF.
SORRY BITCH CAN'T, TAKING SHOTS TO WHITNEY HOUSTON.
You drunk-dialed me and asked me to describe my burrito
Grrr. Fine. You get oral for being unwrong.
Damn victory sex feels great
I'm alone, 3 beers in, and cutting tshirts into belly tops.
Truth. Though I have held steadfast to the notion while the rest of you wavered. I had faith in his homosexuality.
Randomize
