I'm laying in your front yard are you home
i don't have parental supervision. i'm gonna start accepting candy from strangers now.
im going to live freely with my legs opened and my heart closed
I want to say that being forced to stare at the 'no.1 boyfriend' collage behind his head ruined the sex but it just didn't.
sometimes you just have to pull up your panties, blow a kiss to the security camera and walk out of the alley like nothing happened.
got extra credit for showing up to class before a holiday. it hit me 5 minutes later that she meant easter....
This is the first time I have ever hoped it's poison ivy on my cock
I hate find pieces of condom wrappers on carpet. It's like god is throwing flakes of shame for me to vacuum up
new costume idea. paint swatches and a ball gag... I'll be 50 shades of grey.
The bet was for naked jumping jacks. And it back fired, she just laughed at all the slapping noise.
Must say, as a couple, she and I are thrilled that our pretend lesbianism has paid off.
My gay card got upgraded to platinum status today.
You FaceTimed your mom in the back of the limo telling her how many guys you hooked up with at the concert
She made me pour olive oil on her.
Like, my vagina is jet-lagged.
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