There's an old bald Japanese dude on the metra next to me. He's drinking MGD on a crowded train, and rocking out way too hard to what may be the same Dallas Green song I'm listening to. Life is sweet.
You hooked up with a kindergarten teacher?
Yea. It's kind of weird knowing that there are kindergarten teachers out there with their nipples pierced.
After the VIP Latina experience at the strip club last night, I am rooting for Mexico in this years World Cup.
I was on my way at Dorito Smoothie
it was a 10 min screaming orgasm. i don't care that you were next door and didn't appreciate all the noise.
I feel bad for the next person that's gonna live in my room. There's so much semen on the carpet
Does she usually listen to trance and cut up broccoli when she's high?
you know its summer when you wake up on the toilet
The next time you try to involve a tickle me Elmo in my orgasm, I'm leaving you
the amount I squirted last night was insane. Im glad i ignored tlc's advice, i went chasing waterfalls and loved every god damn minute of it.
I think she tried to suffocate me with her tits...she almost succeeded.
Oh, don't mind me, that's just my vagina rattling.
im looking at the positives. number one it stopped me from hooking up with vince infront of his girl, number two it gave me something to do instead of throwing up and number three i fuckin rocked his world
may or may not have entered into a gay civil rights discussion with 6 year olds. Hint: I did.
this strobe light makes my body turn on and off
Randomize
