You remember correctly you did get a golf cart ride out but it wasnt because you were special. You were so smashed you were screaming tiger at random golfers in the middle of there backswing.
can't come out tonight. went to the bar again last night and the bartender hugged and thanked me so much for my "generosity." I'm intrigued but terrified to see my credit card bill.
This gyro tastes like lonliness
Just watched a guy fight a garbage can then pee on it, screaming "I told you to listen to me the first time!!" San Francisco, I've missed you.
I just got kidnapped by the rugby team for a scavenger hunt. I'm "the girl you had sex with last night"
I'm hungover as hell. I'm dying. I have no skin left on my knees
Everything smells like blood and olive oil.
I was trying to get everyone to go to the bar but I puked on my hands, so nobody took me seriously.
We were destined to go to rehab together
Not great. "Leave the toilet seat down, it gives me somewhere to rest my face."
Obviously last night's theme was "Let's Make Bad Life Choices"
Let's get the cat blown out
what food is Colorado known for?
Pot brownies.
My boss asked me what was wrong today and I really wanted to tell her I woke up too late to smoke a bowl before coming in
Let me guess you did your hair instead? Has anyone told you about priorities?
Basically we had a threesome in one room and a fivesome in the next room. Its what I like to call a win win situation.
Randomize
