i want to bang the Snorg tees girl.. shes always smiling ;)
Denmark girl wants me to go out but i remembered shes a raging whore with extremely questionable morals. Not feelin that tonight
SOME GIRL GOT MAGGOTS IN HER COOCH FROM EXPERIMENTING WITH MAYO!
he had a sign stolen from the tennis court hanging above his bed that said, "please limit play to one hour while others are waiting"
at least i was responsible enough to take off my shoe and throw up in it
That's why I don't chug things. Because when I was a freshman in college tequila came out my nose.
im still going. this is my new reality. also. dont take glowsticks in the bath. they explode. actually. do. it. its beautiful.
i dont think thats healthy man...
I'm doing homework tonight but if you end up going out drinking I would like one courtesy peer pressure text.
just reminessing about the wedding and were they seriously to tight to serve a meal oorrrrrr was it just another one of my black-out-by-dinner drunks
the fact that you actualy have a 'black-out-by-dinner drunk' is a bit deserving..
Beer is acceptable at 830am if it's your bday, right?
Well we get the HIV results on my birthday haha. It'll be like happy birthday kid, you have AIDS.
A guy in a banana suit just got the whole bus to participate in a call and response version of Bohemian Rhapsody. HERO
If there was a build-a-penis, I would build that penis.
Well we had to pull over on a side street in town so I could throw up while moms were driving by with car loads of kids, I feel like I just performed a lil silent AA film for the childrens
In honor of Randy Savage we're wearing spandex and handing out slim jim's with option to suplex. Get behind it
Randomize