can you come get me at the bar
ill be there in 10 min
can we stop off at build a bear on the way home
Yeah, it was all fun and games until I realized that it wasn't my tent, and I had no idea who those people were
A guy in a sombrero stopped to take a picture with me sitting on the curb.
I'm not gonna lie. having my legs shaved for me in the morning was a lovely surprise.
in light of our recent drunken behavior, i think it's time we seriously consider hiring ourselves a babysitter.
She just said, "are my livers going to die?"
We had to go visit his dealer in the hospital to buy some weed.
I'll be spending 4/20 on a cruise ship, so i need a babysitter to make sure I don't reenact Titanic
I'm too hungover to crawl to the fridge so im eating the candy nipple tassels I got bought for Christmas
I'm gonna drop in for a zip later man. It made me wanna eat my girls shampoo. Good shit
It wasn't good. I can tell by the way he fucks me he watched too much porn
I want morning sex. We can incorporate maple syrup into it somehow, it'll be fun
We got high and watched Winnie the Pooh. Isn't that what every normal person does on their break?
Thanks for coming over. I'm sorry everyone else was vomiting. Thank you for not vomiting. I love you.
Nothing says Happy Holidays like sending a picture of your ass to the wrong manager.
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