But do you think a lot of ppl use facebook as a masturbation supplement to porn?
Let me make clear that I am not a facebook masturbator
Yay Minnesota! I can't believe there's now a US Senator who has taken more acid than we have
I just gave the bartender my number in roman numerals. If she figures it out, she's worth a shot
its preseason football. its like non alcoholic beer. who gives a fuck
Mattress luging...It's a long story.
He just showed me how to break a chop stick with his ass.
He's tweaking out . If he's on fucking bathsalts and eats my face like a chalupa pull the plug. I don't want to live with no fucking face. Pull. The. Plug.
wait can you just like go into detail with this penis touching thing? like was it a hand job or was it like a day at the petting zoo or something
Hey... Tell me if you remember differently, but nobody truly saw me naked, right?
YOU TRIED TO SWIM IN HER FISHTANK. I don't think she's going to call you.
If you end up wanting to sit on his face, just make a sound like a dying giraffe and I'll make myself scarce.
First night of sleeping in the same bed, and she farted on me. I immediately excused myself and went home. Don't know if we're still together. Will update you.
By the way I can not feel my vagina. It's like it's asleep. What the hell did you do?
You ran the halls of the dorm naked handing out condoms. You were the sex fairy. Best you can do if you're not getting laid.
She should be a lawyer. She convinced her husband to give her a hall pass AFTER he walked in on her in bed with her ex-bf
Randomize