Don't really want to talk about it. You were right. She had a whole jar of toenail clippings on her nightstand that she chews on "when her fingernails are too short." Direct quote.
I told him that he is like a snow storm I never know when he is coming, how many inches I will get, or how long it will last
ra ra ra ah ah
wtf?
sexting lady gaga style
Your clothes are in washers 2,3 and 4. I arranged by darks, whites, then frat... I'm not even joking
she always winds up in the cupboards its nothing new.
she puked as i came inside her. that has to mean something.
I woke up this morning at 8 to my roommates still drunk, hanging out on the roof, and screaming at bikers. They couldn't figure out why they were into it.
I flashed some kids doing a church car wash. I feel like I really improved the quality of their lives.
He is into some weird shit i walked in his room last night he was waving his hard dick around hitting shit yellin cock fight
I'm training him to sit when I whistle the tune from the hunger games. I'm going to be the coolest parent ever.
apparently I got pissed off that no one would let me spray them with a bottle of champagne at midnight of the new year. so I sprayed myself with one shirtless in the near freezing cold outside
Well, while we went through airport security, I found out Mom got her clit pierced, so there's that.
how did you set a fucking salad on fire????????
I lost my wolf penis dildo in my garage. I should probably find it before I resume my garage sale tomorrow...
I never thought I'd be judging my neighbors sex lives before age 30 but here we are
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