Considering the face that your still in jail Im gunna go with no.
Spent $1500 on bottle service and have a lump on my head from hitting the nightstand while puking. Excess? Nooo Success.
I'm pretty sure a girl doesn't give it up with a reverse cow girl...
if I could go back to kindergarten and not fuck up my life, I so would.
i wish i could swallow nair and shit it out and it would get rid of all my ass hair.
We were just about to get down to business and shes like oh the olympics! and jumped up and turned on the tv. cockblocked by freestyle skiing. seriously?
Who won mens moguls?
That canadian guy... bilodeau... but you're missing the point, dude.
We all have a cross to bear. Yours just happens to be attracting gay men.
I think I've hugged the toilet more times than I've hugged my own family members.
mid-sex i was thinking.. these are not the right balls slapping me
When u wake up, don't be alarmed by the passed out mariachi band, they're cool. Muchos gracias
when he put a condom on for a handjob cuz he didn't want to "blow his load in the car" i started to question my choice in guys..
Stop treating my vagina like a slapchop.
i'm going as a slutty football player, and all night i'll drunkily whisper "id love to catch your balls." into random strangers ears.
I was too drunk to remember throwing up so i probably didn't learn my lesson
Dick is the cure to depression. I'm almost positive. And cough syrup.
Randomize
