school has made you so classy.
that's mcgill. producing sluts since 1884.
I think i found my new favorite workout. Go to a party where you dont know anybody and constantly walk around the house so you dont look awkward standing alone. im up to 1.8 miles
he asked if thats how we do it in the states..like there's cultural difference in fucking between canada and the us..
The girls we hooked up with were hammered, pushing each other in a shopping cart into the sushi place and through the restaurant... One's a volunteer EMT. God help her patients.
wtf are you talking about? You vomit-splattered the cop from the balcony. The cop YOU called because you drunk-dialed 911 because a 5 year old ate the last donut.
it was a krispy kreme
Went to 3 separate liquor stores today and I just made a huge tray of jello shots. This will be the Thanksgiving that puts all the others to shame.
He taught me where the gears in a five speed are with his penis.
Drunk logic "let's go outside in front of the bar to get sick"
Let's just say we ended up at Denny's with a strippers shoe that we had to discreetly leave at the door to the strip club this morning
you look like you're about to get down on your knees and give america the business.
I'll pass on that plan. The lack of my penis in new vaginas is no where on the itinerary.
but I truly enjoy making out with my best friend more than my boyfriend
You spent the entire night trying to catch pigeons and hugged a homeless guy and then gave him a pregnancy test.
tonight's safe word is brought to you by the phrase "Ahhhhhh"
I may or may not have been feeling patriotic and banged Captain America in a closet. SPOILER ALERT: We broke his shield
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