Well all I remember is going to sleep being big spoon to you and waking up being little spoon to *****
Im in the beachers at wrigley listening to four lesbians debate the pros and cons of 2girls1cup. Success.
The worst part of it is that he's not the first man I've fucked with 2+ chihuahua's.
she pinky promised me she was 18
I assume you will show your seat mates your vibrating cock ring.
whatever. i don't care. i just want to be drunk wrapped in an american flag.
Just took the worst coed shower ever. We both cried. AND I only shaved one leg.
I feel like I should be doing a victory lap around my house to the rocky music, or zapping and smiting people with my mystic wizard powers
The guys in the quick check just recognized me as the girl who bought rolling papers and whipped cream. This is the walk of shame on crack.
I probably won't go. Last time I got drunk with those guys I just started demanding people let me touch their beards.Then I mocked everyone who didn't have facial hair.
You know you're high when, "Why can't I steal the duck?!" Becomes a serious question.
all i want in life is a shot and a cock is that too much to ask
Just witnessed a man yell "gonna catch a slut!" at himself in the mirror while doing bicep curls at the gym.
I was...perplexed.
Get over here and bring your drill!!! The strippers next door need help installing a stripper pole by their pool
Don’t be alarmed my pee bowl is in your shower
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