He’s a liberal pot smoker and perfect for me. He invented a game where we have to smoke a joint every time you hear a Middle Eastern accent on NPR.
Omg just want to confirm: got drunk, naked in street, fucked in bathroom and puked on bart.
I couldn't tell if he was hitting on me or if he was just mentally challenged.
you can't get genital warts from dogs can you?
puked in the new hous. now it's officially home.
just found the deal breaker
hairy back?
he can't live within 1000 ft of a school
just so you know, the uglier twin gives better bjs..don't be deceived
Apparently, banging my bartender ex-girlfriend = free drinks again. Not every bad decision is a wrong decision.
What's the big deal? you guys fuck
3 times is my limit. I don't even want to know you exist after 3 times
the cop didnt laugh with me when he patted me down and pulled out my flask.
Woke up with two cats staring at me. One covered in puke thats giving me a look that says it might be my fault. Where am I? Come get me.
She told me she's going to buy a projector so she can watch porn on her ceiling...I'm telling you man this chick is going places
I can't believe he let me cut his hair as stoned as I was.. I think I even cut my own hair too
Before we rave about the healing powers of your penis, remember it nearly killed me as well.
He was literally screaming at me for using the same knife to scoop the peanut butter and the jelly.
Randomize
