New invention idea: vibrating tampons
I have a masturbator in my 5th grade class. the teacher told me ever since they caught him humping the desk in 2nd grade, they haven't been able to control him. he's even on medication but he will just do it in class
Fake titties should be able inflate and deflate like tires. So on Saturday you can put on your Double D hooker titties or Sunday put on your size B church tits.
I know man...but i cant pass up a catholic school girl fantasy
She was wearing a shirt that said "Just Do Me", holding a half of a bottle of Vodka, and was screaming at her friends "PUSSY JUST SWALLOW!" before she chugged the rest of the bottle.
Dude, if you don't take her, I will.
You may have noticed the broken smoke detector and melted carpet. We may have accidentally lit a ping pong ball on fire...I'm sorry, but we did our best.
The nursing school interview showed me a picture of my passed out during your party. They asked if this was a frquent thing. I told them you drugged me.
His dad asked what he was doing so he texted his FATHER a picture of me wearing his shirt in his bed.
It feels like eating ice cream while riding a unicorn over a rainbow waterfall made of glitter.
That is possibly the gayest thing that was ever thought of by anyone anywhere.
I'll even give you a complementary welcome blowjob.
I legitimately thought I was gonna die getting finger banged to ja rule in the back of your car last night.
So did he inherit the massive family cock?
:(
I woke up to see that I had ripped my boxers into a loin cloth because we were watching last of the mohicans
17. The number of times my one night stand told me he loved me.
After my second liter of German beer, nothing D-cup or larger is safe near me.
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