Oh and ps....i was sleeping soundly until i woke up by the sound of amy on the phone with her mom sobbing hysterically because she can't stop having the shits.
that was a gay-test. you passed.
with flying rainbow colors i hope!
Why the hell does jager make you get to the point of having to army crawl around cause you cant feel your legs and scream jaga bombs when puking??
He is like that thing on the menu you would eat because nothing else looks remotely edible.
I got to watch him fuck me from behind in the reflection of an ornament. so glad I decorated.
heading to class now, facing the weekend consquences
Well the pizza delivery man was either startled or incredibly intrigued to see me skateboarding in the living room by myself at 1 in the morning in ripped pantyhose
She just passive-aggressively stripped in the kitchen while humming the theme to Doug.
Ok well I'll be up all night studying if you need a wake up call or a place to put your penis.
That would make regret #10
He was more like the original regret
His exact words were "Can I meet your vagina?" I kept wondering if he was going to try to shake hands with it...
I'm 99% sure I just flashed my dad with my vagina. So that's the new low now.
Ultimate fat girl moment: I promised him my mouth for the night if he bought me a funnel cake..
Masturbating with Lord of the Rings on was not how I planned my afternoon going but here I am.
How is it that on the one day I'm just moving my car at 6:30 I get the walk of shame looks but when I come home at 9 am in a torn dress holding heels old ladies smile at me?
Randomize
