It was as awful as eating cow testicles on fear factor and not winning and realizing you ate balls for nothing.
Jeremys mom is here. I gave her mad jello shots and now were griding. ima give it to her: ultimate payback for him fucking my gf.
I feel kinda awkward using the Sesame Street themed Google to search for hot young pussy...
i'm at a baby shower....never been happier to not be having sex currently
no, i swear. she uses a huge jagermeister flag as a sheet on her bed.
Dude I need help. What word is complimentary, but sounds like "chunky"?
He kept moaning America instead of Erica while fucking me.
I found you laying in the kitchen with a bottle of vodka and a slice of bologna on your face. You said you were having a spa day.
They make twin pack pregnancy tests for girls like us
bring the dog... nobody goes to jail with a dog.
Just did a "spirit of homecoming" bump off a stranger's credit card. A stranger that dropped us off at home. Erica's bad. How do allllll of the Eastern Europeans know how to find drugs so easily?!?
Its a sick, sad, world when parents get more ass then you.
Let's celebrate that I used a condom
We just had can't-look-you-in-the-eye sex and it was still surprisingly good
things i am: 1) still drunk 2) still wearing my leopard onesie 3) still gonna make my 9am lecture despite the odds CAN I GET A HIGH FIVE
Randomize
