he threw mangos from the tree he was in at people and got arrested for harassment
he was uncircumcised...I HAVE NOT YET REACHED THAT SKILL LEVEL OF DICK
I thought pig tail meant you were suppose to grab on to it when getting BJ
just balanced a champagne glass on my gut. thanks to beer im a living breathing tempur-pedic mattress.
I sent the random girl I had sex with last night a 'happy mothers day' text as a reminder to get the morning after pill.
Soup is not an acceptable meal before doing that many Jager bombs
and then she judged me for using my bra as a potholder. hard times my friend, welcome to college.
My mom woke me up in a bubble bath this morning.
just thought you should know it took me an hour and a half to make soup. I had to keep laying on my kitchen floor. being 21 is hard.
bring the dog... nobody goes to jail with a dog.
We put your drunk ass to bed. 10 minutes later we heard you scream "DICK-PUNCH!!!" It was immediately followed by a shriek of pain and crying. So to answer your question; no, that's not "sex soreness".
When we were finished I asked him how long it had been since he'd cum that hard. He thought really hard for a while before telling me his brain forgot how years worked.
I just woke up ass naked on top of all my sheets, with no blinds in my room because i used them as togas, my back is killing me, im covered in sharpie, i have no memory of last night, and im pretty sure im still drunk. I consider the night a success
what could you have possibly accomplished by watching 6 hours of a mythbusters marathon
well, i added sex in a wind tunnel to my bucket list
There was a woman who drank mouth wash to get drunk during her supposed detox...this is def the internship for me!
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