Fiestas. Its like a classier verson of mardi gras.
He just walked into my room in a robe with a cooking pot of cereal.
bro, sorry for: trying to put you on fire yesterday, telling the bouncer that it was you that broke the bottles, and to have slept with your sister.
When the doctor said the anal leakage might not be reversible without some lifestyle changes you start asking if it's worth the entertainment value.
I will be naked everywhere
I think this girl gave me a handjob thinking that I would help her with her cell phone bill
omg. that's awesome
Me hangover (as projected). That sounds like a plan. Ill do it for Mexico
I also tried to solve my dog's itching problem with crystal healing. I'm so high, dude.
I just rubbed amethyst all over him and kept saying 'no bites.'
When you're not at your house I assumed you're somewhere having sex
I'm on the same pooping schedule as a professor I've never had. He now says what's up to me in the hallway
Still drunk on my morning "run" which has turned into a walk. Just burped fireball
I made out with a girl because I wanted to get in the VIP section of the bar because they have these big comfy couches. It worked.
I know it's my dream I got hurt enough to leave work but not hurt enough to stop drinking
My mom heard me having sex with my boyfriend but thought it was the neighbors. She commented on how quick it was. I just nodded and changed the subject
I fuckin love you!
I would reciprocate the feeling if i knew who this was.
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