as for my dating sex life, no more regret sticks. Only pride wands from now on.
I just saw the host of Singled Out do standup. Holy shit 1995.
Thats my favorite, when ex girlfriends become XL ex girlfriends
You lit the bowl with a rolled up paper towel that you ignited on the stove.
I think it is impossible 2 take a person seriously when their last name is Pancake
I really shouldn't have to apologize. It was your own damn fault for opening a tab at the bar and telling me about it.
I've come to realize sober is a rare time of the day.
This teachers last name is pfister and she did the fisting motion to help explain how to pronounce her name. This class might be good
If your boss lets you sleep on his couch, you don't pay him back by boning his daughter.
I left for five minutes and Chris wound up half in women's clothes, half naked. And the naked half was covered in shamrock stickers.
I don't care how great the sex was, I cannot unsee what has been seen. I regret ever stalking his Facebook.
I don't need to know how horny your mother is, hun.
I'm having leftover pizza for breakfast. I'm clearly not the greatest at this adult thing.
Although the guy I'm messing around with just offered to let me be his rich brother's sugar baby
he literally walked in took a shit and left ringing the 'great service' bell on the way out.
Randomize
