found some acid from a couple months ago while looking through christmas lights. Looks like santa came early this year.
i just snorted my name. best moment ever
I could hear his roommate in the background imitating my sex sounds...
I really hope you aren't where I think you are. Dude she has a MUSTACHE. You need Jesus..
the campus cop used the word depravity in our citation.
Idk. Last year there was an ice luge, glow in the dark jungle juice, and lots of naked people. I feel like I'll get pregnant just thinking about going to that party.
It was his first time doing shrooms and we made him ride in the truck bed. But he kept standing up and yelling when we stopped so we had to keep driving
Me too. We could do it like prostitutes. No kissing on the mouth.
I woke up and found a stick of butter in my pocket. There's no butter in the house so I don't know who's it is. Using it to make cookies.
All's fair in love and war. and tinder.
But what I'm actually thinking about is how everyone except me had sex on my bed this weekend and now I'm just sleeping in it with a 7 foot tall blue panda
True fear is being unable to remember where you hid your weed and vibrator in your parent's house.
I don't know what happened last night. But I just woke up in the high school boiler room
Im at a south american orphan benefit auction drinking stoli in a coffee mug, this is what my life has become, thanks a lot community college
I still can't believe a guy pooped in my backyard
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