Can i come over
After you called me a desperate slut? No
Come over
you ate skittles off the table like a hungry hungry hippo. it was awesome.
Just finished my law exam. Questions 4-18 seemed to pertain specifically to things we've done this semester.
Hah, I lost the lenses in my glasses, didn't event notice til this morning... How was the meeting?
I no longer see him as a simple set of male genitalia attached to a very sexy body. The title "trophy fuck" seems wrong. Damn.
I have got to stop singing on voicemails. I just left my dad a 6 minute musical message.
Sorry, they don't make maternity Power Ranger suits...
hes that one kid that offered to spoon after staring at me for 5 minutes
I guess "Ass Fun Friday" is not a thing no matter how many times I say it or bring it up in conversation...
He came in two seconds and stole my pizza so I'm not counting it.
Someone just asked me why I drink so much. Im gonna slap a bitch
I'm a lady. Ladies do NOT hump the floor.
I guess the weekly d&d orgies are treating you well
A true gentleman never tells. But yes, I did indeed get laid last night
Help. Why am I so naked?
Randomize
