I did that thing again where I get way too drunk and go gay. Then wake up in the morning and freak out at the person. Yet another bar I cannot go back to
I would say a second date is not looking likely, I acciedentally bit his penis. it's still bleeding 43 minutes later.
You leave a trail of fuck everywhere you go
She's gone now. Left with the wind like a majestic leaf that just rides the invisible current to locations unknown. And dude, her friends were really hot.
So another one of your girlfriends from middle school had a baby. Thank god you are gay, otherwise you would definitely be a dad by now.
we were hooking up and then he goes "you can touch my penis" and i laughed too hard to do anything. no second date.
Jake and I will do a protection ritual for ur dick I don't know where she has been
YES. YOU ARE GOING TO HAVE SEX WITH ME WHILE I SING LES MIS.
Technically ya I did. Hes tried to get down my pants like 3 times now and every time I have been all "these are not the Droids you are looking for"
If by some world ending natural disaster I get into an actual relationship with this kid, should I tell him the truth about the web of lies I've based our current relationship on?
I could see myself being this awkward weirdo drunk girl that patted strangers and danced terribly but was powerless to stop it
I shouldn't be drunk at 3 pm but alas, here we are...
Im gnna go loik fir my newq gay friuend now
Goodbee
If we were teenagers we would intentionally be trying to burn down this historic landmark
OMG OMG OMG!!!! I made his penis bleed!! I repeat I MADE HIS PENIS BLEED!!!!
Randomize