I think I saw a glimmer of recognition, but she must not have been able to make me out through all of her whorishness.
someone shit in a solo cup and left it at the base of the stairs. fuck orlando dude.
I fucked her on my hockey bag. it doesnt get any more Canadian than that.
he had two deer mounted on his dorm room wall with panties and bras hanging from the antlers... i cant believe i contributed to bambi's headgear...
she is medically diagnosed as a nympho. she has the paper to prove it. hell. fucking. yeah.
My Valentine's Day plans just drastically changed... My F buddy just ran into my gf...in my driveway.
I'll answer your question with a question: Are you gonna be too high?
I consider myself to be an upstream bisexual
You're the salmon of the gays...
I'm so confused as to where the sexual euphemisms end and the drinking starts
I feel like I beer bonged a ton of asbestos
I swear to god if you keep eating my cats food drunk I am going to kick you out of our apartment.
Can I just keep holy water in the night stand next to the vibrator?
We laughed, we cried, we fucked, we shirked our familial and work related responsibilities. They could make a movie about the last 40 hours of our lives.
Failing this, see a doctor for elephant tranquillisers, to be taken with whiskey orally, twice at dawn.
ok morning sex is a totally valid reason to come in late... ur good, cya in 20
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