i spent my evening searching "the sims having sex" on youtube
we're no longer friends
Decided against hooking up with creepy stalker guy for a ride to work. I feel I've earned a few self respect points back.
He only talks to me during the summer and it's probably because I let him fuck me in my pool last year.
This is davidson friend mat i an drunk. Thank you for having a physical relationship. With David. I bet he gas a penis the size of an elephant tusk. You are a lucky lady.
Confirmed. Vegetarians give terrible head.
was it me or did you scream 'champagne motherfucker' when you punched him in the face ??
WE SHOULD FUCK TWO GUYS THAT LIVE TOGETHER
THAT WOULD BE SO CONVENIENT WE COULD CARPOOL
Also I just learned you, Samantha, and I three-way made out at my Halloween party. News to me.
Yeah started playing at the wedding last night, when the line. "Ludacris fills cups like DD" he starts pointing at my tits right in front of his grandparents.
I'm far too poor to be letting my hookups wear my shirts home. I'm down to about a total of 8 shirts and have no intention of buying more
I'm trying to be celibate. I'm having me time. I'm eating cake.
If that orgasm indicates how the rest of the year is going to go, I need to buy rain boots.
Just threw up in the trash can at my desk. I guess "beating the hangover" eventually leads to this.
I see myself subsisting on tequila for the next several days.
Why is there a waffle in the knife drawer?
The real question is why are there knives in the waffle drawer.
Randomize
