what do kids with lesbian moms do for father's day? like do you talk about it? is it awkward? do you get the butchy mom a card?
I realized today that I should stop thinking so much with my vagina instead of my brain.
Please tell me this doesn't mean another "surprise road trip" where I spend all my money on gas and the SURPRISE destination is the abortion clinic.
But what if I pay for the gas?
Yeaaah, so cabbie laughed at me, and said, "rough nite? Let me find you some music" . apparently OPP is the appropriate ride of shame soundtrack.
Yeah well tell that to drunk me. She seems to have no standards or gender preference.
they sound like some classy girls.
Hey, I don't give them daddy issues, I just take advantage of it. The real bad guy here is American parenting.
There's gotta be a lawn gnome full ecstasy around here somewhere. And by golly I will find it
Given he decided my interview was a date, showed up drunk and insisted on carrying me everywhere, we weren't off to a good start.
I heard moaning and ass slapping and sponge bob.
Can you think of a sexual word rhyming with snorkel?
I figured it out! The supermoon explains how I managed to have sex with 3 dudes in 3 nights without leaving the apartment.
All I remember is grabbing a random guys dick at the bar and him just saying thank you and us taking a shot together
He spilled some of his beer on your shoulder then proceeded to lick it off. By the face you made, I don't know if you were completely horrified or really turned on.
Oh don't mind my cushion, I got plowed in the ass by a freight train last night
All I did today was eat pizza and use my vibrator.
Like I'll lick your nuts to make you feel better if you don't get it
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