You Definitely drank the goldfish bowl like it was a giant margarita
One girl and one boy is just not enough.
If i need to get strippers involved i will.
You may have graduated college on time, but my 6th year ass gets to see awesome tits every day just for showing up.
So the first 4 hours of my morning was equivalent to seeing under water. Things were starting to get better until I remember I drank mustard for free stuff and flossed my teeth with a strand of hair from a stranger in the bathroom.
I whipped my shit out and she just stared at it with a mean face. It was like a face off in a heavyweight boxing fight.
Did we almost burn down the bar last night? I guess flaming shots were a bad idea.
He showed up at my house, drunk, proclaiming that he needed to fuck me...my dad let him in
It was awk he was sittin on a plastic backyard chair in his underwear and high white socks in the dark watching the nuggets game
it's too much effort for something that isn't food.
I just got fingered in the Win-Co parking lot for pills. How's your meltdown going?
My vagina is glad I'm back at work because it needs a vacation after working all through my vacation.
Also, I wish we had magnetic nipple rings and our boobs stuck together.
he fucked me while wearing his "Reagan Bush '84" tank and my inner democrat has never been more disappointed
Eventually the conversation shifted (as it always does) to Sex toys.
Randomize
