she just fell off the couch. onto a bag of pretzels. her face resembled a cat that just swallowed a sock.
So about class tomorrow..... i,ll be there. But I may be still a bit drink and wearing a suit. I'll explain when I get there.
We followed the campus tour around in a golf cart drinking PBR and blasting "Sexual Healing."
how was ur day?
this is strictly sexting don't make small talk.
Weer fine. went to buiy cigxs, but hes theonly one waering shoes. He caem out wti chicke fingers instead. whatecer, there th 8 dollar kind.
You owe me new eyes. The ones I have are burned with your balls into the back of my eyes. And every time I close them, your balls are right there...
I'm dressed like a deranged cupcake. Let's get fucked up.
I took Xanax and it did nothing to me. First sign I'm crazy and actually need it.
How's dating the med student working out for you?
After we had sex last night he showed me where my spleen was.
A true anatomy project.
Haha its fine we ask know it. He's still cool thought
Focus on the keyboard man. Focusssss
I mean it was fine and all but I just don't understand why a man would need all that Simon Cowell paraphanelia
you licked my face then when I finally got you to the bathroom, mid puke you said you liked the taste of my foundation.....you weren't drunk at all....
Don't be offended, the only thing I'm attracted to right now is snack cakes and chicken wings.
Just took a shot of 151, rimmned my middle finger in it, lit it on fire and lit a cigarette off it while flicking off my boss. How was your night??
If you keep giving me that glorious dick ill bake you some cookies
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