I feel like your standards for women is like rent-a-centers standards for credit.
I love watching others lives come down to our level.
I'm blazed about to take my 8am final. Another girl is too. We just looked each other in the eyes. She's my soul sister.
i seriously wanted to pee on her right then.
I've spent more money on drugs for bonnaroo than my actual ticket. Proudly.
At this point if I didn't go to work hungover I think the whole place would think something is wrong
It's sitting in bleach right now. You will be the creepiest coolest dude in my book if you made a bracelet from my tooth.
I don't have any bail money, if that's where this conversation is going
I woke up in his bed wearing nothing but a penn state hat. We are....
Way to go. Now you have no beer and I have a cold tit.
BOOOOOOOOOOOO *takes away your hoe card*
Dude I turned down free booze. I think I'm growing as a person.
I feel like my foot is being amputated. Or maybe it's the vodka. I couldn't tell you.
I’m going to have to rewatch all of them. Drugs, man.
Woke up went to work ate beef after three year hiatus shat my pants went to bed
Randomize
