So what does a sober person do in Vegas on a Friday night?
explain to me why "crisis hotline lolz" is in my contacts?
I showed remarkable dignity in such a compromising situation. Except I came off as sort of a blue ball giver.
I don't know what you told him but please make him stop telling me about his new video camera and winking
its coolsest when we hear the beat in our water bottles. and the likghts are in his eyes now. oh holland
You passed out while holding my hair during a blow job.. i think your gona have to earn back blow jobs
I have to stop envisioning penises as dragons.
I just took the cheapest shot in your honor
If he survived pride he can survive a gay bar
I think I used my NERF gun during sexual roleplay. Need to re-evaluate my life choices.
ORGASMS AND PIZZA
PIZZA AND ORGASMS
You left me a drunk voicemail of you describing your pizza to me at 2 AM
That seems dangerous to buy acid from a stranger on craigslist
You know it’s going to be a rough day when you scream “Get fucked” at your alarm clock
Remember the random guy who licked my face when we were at the bar the other night?
Yeah. His name is Andrew. We just met
Randomize
