Is it morally objectionable to repay my debt to society with drug money?
You know, if there were no such thing as marriage, i don't think porn would exist.
i jus got home and totaly forgot i had nut all over the back of my shirt
..im mad u rememberd about that
the boy next to me on the plane handed me a shot glass, then a perkaset, and told me to have a good week off..hellllo spring break.
I have a ginormous moral hangover. Strip club blues.
I wouldn't accept the money so he folded the $20 bill into an origami puppy and left a note saying "Not blowjob money"
I didn't scare your mother by showing up on the roof, did I?
also bought condoms to give away to people who look like they're about to make a bad halloween decision. I'm like a fairy.
Dude, I had to stop mid fuck. Her cat was swatting at my balls as I did her from behind. I couldve lost something.
Just a heads up... Don't get high and attempt to do your own taxes
Some people dream of being astronauts others dream of having genitalia that shines like Edward Cullen in the sun
just once I'd like to not pass out before we leave the designated pre-drinking place
I should probably stop opening conversations with 'guess who's horny'.
If I get really high and watch Beauty and The Beast on our Netflx account, will you judge me?
Only if you start before I get home!
I can't believe the MLB is making the NHL look good.
Randomize
