i dont know why he would complain when i touch him there.
oh yeah I'm gonna practice throwing up so I can be ready for Friday night. and Saturday. Beth is back, diaper and all.
I'm like connect-the-dots of drunk. Whiskey, bourbon, vodka, rum, gin. The hidden picture is me faceplanting.
He left an unopened 12 pack of beer by my bed. I guess that's his way of saying thanks for the sex..
He thought the strainer was a giant bowl to puke in.
So I am just swinging blind here, but I am guessing that blood in your sinus is not ideal
Day drunk and a can of soup and wine straight from the bottle and alone and on my kitchen floor.
you don't know true fear until you are a convinced that velociraptors are trying to kill you through your roof.
The bride and groom wore the Batman masks I brought. Best wedding ever.
I'm worried about your health. And your boobs. Actually, health, then boobs. Health first, boobs second. And third.
yeah I woke up in jail with two different shoes on and neither of them were mine
orgy was averted by karaoke, thank god
So you broke your ribs while fucking? Dude you just got about 25% hotter.
How don't you remember..? You were getting handfuls of skittles out from our bra screaming TASTE THE RAINBOW.
Why are you hurting?
Tried to drink all the beer in Nashville last night....failed.
Randomize
