Just when you think you're never going to have sex again, BOOM you're naked in bed with a guatemalan
The highlight of my night was definitely explaining the bandaid on my nipple.
I am on a roof. I'm not sure which one, or why, or how, but I am on a roof and you should come get me. I can see info classrooms!
Bud light lime after 12 shots of vladdy is like frolickin in a meadow of sweet flavor
Due to certain anatomical proportions it was less like fucking and more like childbirth.
I just had the stunning realization that I lost my virginity in a bunk bed.
you're the third guy in less than 24 hours she fucked. I'm glad you lost your virginity just don't act like you climbed Mt. Everest.
What happened to fro yo and sex?
It's always great when the guy I get pills from sends me an email that says "I know you will get clean it's going to be hard but I know you can do it"
Have you ever given your heart and soul to someone and they turn out to be nothing but a great fuck that makes a mean grilled cheese because same
apparently in the middle of sex, i said "i just really love the food network i watch it every day"
Is talking to an iron man poster a good or bad indicator that you've been drinking too much?
Well I've decided to refuse to conform to society and be naked the rest of the day.
I'm not just straddling the line between love and hate, I'm dry humping the shit out of it
My boyfriend's mom is the manager of Wendy's. The same one I took a pregnancy test in.
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