Just once id like a girl to say to me in the dracula voice, i want...to suck...your dick...
The make-up sex just reminded me why we broke up in the first place.
you know when i was in school the girls definitely did not have the tits the 15 year olds have now. so unfair.
No jewlry, no bra, and no pen. I couldnt be more prepared for a friday morning class.
U just looked at me and said "wake me up when I'm done eating"
I feel like my whole life has been one big pre-game for Mexico.
I just met the neighbor hes a self proclaimed coke dealer/ softporn producer.
The window painters skipped us. They didn't know what to do with the giant SMOKE WEED in the window. So they just skipped it.
Ummm, my mojito just spilled on 2 essays as I'm grading. Who says high schoolers have all the fun?
Made up a full house drinking game
On my way.
This love triangle bullshit is getting out of hand. It's now a love polygon and I want out
I got propositioned to get involved with an engaged couple. I told them I didn't think my married couple would like me to see other couples...
I spent the entire party sexting people's significant others for them because they were too drunk to do it themselves. I did quite well too. I should start a business
Your pictures have evolved a lot over the years but I think your angry dick pic phase was one of my favorites
So, I need to know. Why did you spraypaint your underwear gold?
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