Fuck, operation next sex victim is on as soon as i get back. Do not sleep with that red head, nobody likes accidental ginger babies.
I really love her but I don't think I can go the rest of my life without anal.
How do you tell if you're on the terrorist watch list?
True friendship; bangin a girl to get ur friends hat back
Just tried to use the bottle of Sprite in my car as mouthwash to get the taste of puke out of my mouth- it's half vodka. Puked again. Thanks man.
This is the last pregnancy scare i've had since i was 12 and i thought you could get pregnant from masturbating.
I had very briefly met him a few years ago. My friend was tired of hearing us both complain about being horny. She figured she would fuck two birds with one stone.
Stop watching porn on my work computer.
STOP WORKING ON MY PORN COMPUTER.
If you're funny as hell and have a mustache, odds are I'm probably gonna fuck you
Appearently I went across the hall last night demanding to ride my neighbors moose... How much did I drink?
I will never use my dick in anger. With great dick comes great responsibility
Dude, my vagina feels like new again! I love antibiotics. How's your day?
It's so weird fucking this kids aunt then going to the gym with him everyday, but my sick minded self loves it.
I’m pregaming Christmas shopping with grandma. What’s up?
Jenna is yelling bc of the condom wrappers and cum stains. This is the 3rd and last time you have sex in my roommates bed.
Randomize
