Is it bad that everytime I read or hear "Woo Hoo" I immediately think of sex because of The Sims?
Went home with a 29 year old from the bar. Life lesson: 9 year olds stay up late sometimes
you made wolf sounds and yelled "team me" the entire movie
She said she never had to courage to go fully shaved. Since when did shaving your snatch become courageous?
I cannot convey how much I really do love Chris Hansen. FYI: he is the JC Chasez of my adult years.
I already apologized. And I got cum in my eye in return, I say your night beats mine...
Finals week has gone away, doo dah doo dah, drink martinis naked day oh da doo dah day
I show up hung over with mcdonalds. Why wouldn't he have sex with me? It's a fucking leap year...
I lost all of my bathing suit tops.. This is both a success and a failure
I don't understand why you aren't on this trip all I do is smoke weed drink beer and get fingered
It's Been a while since I puked in vomit bush. I hope it doesn't feel neglected
My one night stand just messaged me and said he is praying for me...
friends are allowed to bang on New Years, I read it on the Internet somewhere.
She'd probably like you more if you'd stop fucking her husband.
Let's get this straight. I am six fucking feet tall. Do you even understand how limited my options in guys to date are? No. Did you see my last three boyfriends? I looked like a fucking giant next to them. So I will fuck this six-foot-seven Italian model even if I am the ugliest girl at this party because, goddammit, I deserve to.
Randomize