Cool, see you soon... she just admitted to her friends that it was a queef.
i am pregamming alone in my car. scale of 1-10 how alcoholic is that
im pretty sure thats an 11
She swallowed my jizz and then took a shot of jack daniels and said "chaser." This cant be real life.
at the bar. watching boys pee in urinals. when they come out we give them a thumbs up or a thumbs down. probbb shouldn't prop the bathroom door open with a bar stool....
well its a long story but basically i overcame many cockblocks
The sales associate looked at me funny for wobbling in the heels i was trying on until i told her i was trying to see how well i'd be able to drunk walk in these tonight
The grocery store is a combo of ghetto ppl complaining that the low fat chips are all that's left and hipsters trying to eat organic during the hurricane
I cannot be this high in this house. This house has so many of my secrets in its walls.
Two months ago an unknown man was in my bed and now he is my boyfriend and he has 1.6 million in the bank and he buys me things because I only have $4.35 in my bank account
It could happen to you too!
He said he doesnt believe in the female orgasm,so no I did not have sex with him.
you can't just say no to brian. he was bugging me to get me to drunk for 14 hours straight yesterday. HE DOESN'T GIVE UP
That moment when you can't decide if you should vote for the random frat guy you have head to at the beginning of the semester for business and technology senator.
You aren't truly friends with someone until you play drinking games via text at 8:30 in the morning.
It felt like I was on painkillers mixed with Molly mixed with the sinking feeling I'll die alone. 10/10 doing again.
at the hospital. Kevin drank straight from the river
Randomize
