i learned of a new sex move called the pterodactyl. 3 guys stand in a row. 1 girl blows the one in the middle while jerking off the other two. kids these days!
Yaeh! Back in our day we had to wait our turn for some party whore to blow us!
well there you go. the average partycunt evolved into megapartycunt just like scientists predicted.
i dunno what you eat but your cum is all over my underwear and it smells like pretzels
She kept saying how cute and adorable I was. I felt like a care bear getting a blowjob
Gold rum. Strong marijuana. Jabba the Hut in stilettos. Deep thigh bruise. Yes, thal all happened. Sorry dude.
I just pictured ballsacks being shoveled into the furnace of the Titanic.
Please tell me last night did not happen and there is another reason why my phone smells like ranch sauce ahahah
Can you think of a sexual word rhyming with snorkel?
But idk if I cried about life then banged him or banged him and then cried. Chicken or the egg?
she came into my car to rip lines with our blow dealer as I was writing my essay on anti drug policy, i call it on site research
I was giving him a blowjob but we had to stop because he started crying when his cat walked in and started staring at us
AND ONCE AGAIN, MY VAGINA HAS STRUCK AGAIN. HER PLANS TO TAKE OVER MARYLAND ARE WELL ON THEIR WAY AS SHE CONTINUES TO ENGULF EVERY QUEER IN A 10 MILE RADIUS
I've had more orgasms than showers this week.
And you tried to get me to have sex with you in our Harry potter closet lol
All I remember is being in the middle of the road puking and my bestfriend cheering me on from the passenger seat...
We should write a country song: “Blacked Out on a Sunday”
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