I think I died a long time ago.
Two girls are now jumping in the ocean naked at 10 PM...and I was just starting to hate Ocean City
you decided to have a spaghetti fight but then you got greedy and decided to eat it all.
Someone shattered a urinal.
Hes flirting with her via the sauce packets at taco bell....... I have no words
What's the over under on catching something from your sister?
True. I'd rather snort cocaine off a homeless guy then work on the weekend...Actually that may not be that bad.
That kid who fell through your coffee table is here. In a toga.
i'll fuck you during the next apocalypse. promise
This amicable friendliness is dull. We either need to start fighting or fucking around. I'll even let you pick.
there is absolutely nothing wrong with two grown men staying up all night blowing lines drinking white wine and playing call of duty. don't judge me
Why would you waste your Ritalin on your children?
wanna see your best friend chug a bottle of steak sauce?
please go to sleep
My desire to pee is a lot higher than my need to be buzzed right now.
I have a whole new respect for her. She chugged half a bottle of jack daniels, and then peed all over his wall. Serves him right.
Randomize
