Just found 50 pesos and a coke spoon in my dads old shit. Gotta love the 70s
He found my weave.. Think he'll still fuck me Friday? And how do I ask for it back?
as she was beating the hell out of his ex, she screamed prison rules, and smashed her head with a beer bottle. I'm oddly afraid yet so attracted to her now.
Hahah fuuuck, bag pipers played around me while I threw up. Literally
I heard liver failure is in for 2012 anyways
Congratulations, your dick has been selected to participate in my birthday sex. Please reply with a response.
Do I have a choice?
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Let's just say he sent me a picture of his dick and I was more impressed with the collection of video games he had in the background...
We knew it was a good time to leave when you spilt the salsa on the ground and were trying to put it back in the jar with your hands
all i know is there's a picture on my phone of him wearing my purple sweatpants and licking the bottom of my foot.
I'm pretty sure ignoring the person that just sent you a picture of their boobs is bad nude etiquette.
Welp. It's confirmed. There is literally no lube on this entire island. Fuck me. More accurately, don't fuck me.
I smell like cotton candy and guilt.
He nicknamed his dick "the fountain of youth" I think it's time to move on...
She has a girlfriend too.. we decided that two cheats equal eachother out to zero. with our flawed grasp on algebra and the bottle of jack we were passing back and forth the logic seemed airtight.
Why is there a trampoline for sale in my front yard?
Randomize
