I guess what I'm trying to say is you've fucked more people than the economy.
Be honest with Daniel. He was a good rebound to you for nine months and he made it so you could be with the one you really love and care for now. Just tell him thanks and best of luck.
I really think we need to get on this Charlie Sheen bandwagon
I feel like I was just dunked in a tub of beer and then thrown in a giant dryer with rocks in it.
thanks for at least making it out of the pool before you threw up
I just bid on a $9000 car because I think its my ex-girlfriends. Yes I wanna hit that again.
Good news! I don't have Hep C! Better news! I still hate you!
There something about a girl that pirates lemonade off a restaurant fountain as a mixer that I find intriguing.
The Blue Grotto manager called. He asked me for your name and number. Apparently, on reviewing the videotape he noticed you consumed a whole pizza by yourself. He indicated that he has a tshirt for you and wants to put your picture on his eating wall of fame. Apparently, you are the first such person to complete this incredible feat of eating. Congratulations to you!! I am so proud.
Code 10 We gotta leave. Now. I took a dump in the upstairs toilet and its clogged and overflowing, and believe me I don't want to have to explain myself to this frat on parents weekend.
I folded my dollar bills into mustaches in preparation for our trip to the strip club
I've peed outside too many times in just this past week
He radiates elegant sexual dominance. I bet even his balls have pinstripes.
It was all going good until I realized she was wearing underwear with a butt flap. Mission aborted.
I’m a little confused...we were told by Cheeto Jesus and his minions multiple times that we would stop hearing about coronavirus the day after the election and, yet, I am still hearing about coronavirus. Is it possible they lied to us again?!?
Randomize
