Does transporting jello shots count as driving with an open container?
Her friend drew me a diagram of how we could get away with her giving me a blowjob at work.
He noticed there was ketchup on his shirt and took it off. Noticed there were people there and put it back on. Then he saw the ketchup again. He must have taken his shirt on and off about 6 times
im drinking italian dressing and watching dexter. its 230am. lets never drink on sundays again.
The bridesmaid just threw up on herself. This is going to be the best wedding ever
He came inside me, looked me in the eye and said, "Happy Mother's Day"
My ex was here I looked him in the eyes when I grabbed some other guy by his belt and dragged him to a room
He tried to give me a shoulder massage while i peed in the neighbors bushes to "make it more relaxing."... I let him... That drunk
What is she getting? Last time we talked her behavior was conducive to getting a tramp stamp on her face.
so hungover. i just puked at the sight of the beer emoticon you sent me.
well theres no bloody mary mix at the campus bookstore so i dont even know what its good for
But like it was sooo bad! At one point he tried to flip me over and he fell off the bed
Banged a guy with 2 broken arms once. Top that
See I am maturing. I just got in from my DRIVE of shame......
Who is naked dude in the kitchen?
Randomize
