The bubbles in my bathtub are singing to me in german....
he was so high that he wouldn't speak to anybody for like 30 minutes, he'd only gobble, like a turkey.
if you were drunk and peed in your friend's washing maching, would you send an "i'm sorry" text or say nothing at all?
all hypothetical of course
What's a "vodkaffle"?
It's where she puts vodka in the waffle mix.
WHY AREWNT YOU HERE SO MUCH FUN STUFF DO IT GET IN CAR NOW caps lock
want the rest of his teeth to fall out while he slowly dies alone. Pretty sure I'm to the anger phase.
Keep your head up. His game is good, and you should be honoured to be a notch on his wall. If it makes you feel better, if it wasn't you, it was going to be me.
New life rule, no banging opera singers. I might be a little deaf now
My vagina is trying to run away to Boston without me.
Way to go. Now you have no beer and I have a cold tit.
I'm now using my vagina for good, not evil. Trying to restore balance to the force.
Oh shit that's not good dude. I'd head straight for Williamsport hospital the first ingredient in that shit is lithium batteries. You don't want to know what the second one is
And speaking of good acting I may have a sex tape now
I NEED A MOM FRIEND. NOW.
Oh you know, we just bobbed for apples in a bucket full of jungle juice. So, a casual Tuesday night.
Randomize
