glow-in-the-dark stars on his ceiling from '98 totally make blowing him more romantic.
Still can't believe they give people like us a drivers license and college degree.
Theres a picture of me with cut up clothes rolling in the policeman's lawn, I missed you, summer.
We ran out of ice cubes so I used ice cream. Everyone thought that was the plan all along. I just went with it.
My penis has a 100% approval rating. He has never received a formal complaint. If you'd like to file one, you can go fuck yourself.
I don't see how I managed to fuck up so much shit in an hour and a half..
We split an eighth of shrooms and went ice fishing. It didn't get weird until I caught one and we both started crying.
Hahaha idk what's worse your life or my hangover.
Crying while listening to Miley Cyrus. BE GLAD YOU JUMPED THIS SINKING SHIP!
I feel better now, I have multiple fuck buddies again
So, I actually said the words "but face tattoos are sexy"
im gonna shove his purity ring down his throat
I watched one of the videos of you hanging from the rafters, and it is both violent and sexual in nature.
I'm hungover and in a fort. And I hate you.
So many questions
I love you so much and not just because your dick is perfect
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