i think i would be more confident if i were chinese.
Apparently married women at the office don't like getting congratulated on getting "knocked up"
i just got fired from my job because i was "too smart" and my immedate response was i am WAY too stoned to be considered smart, and theni walked out the door.
wow. i have no words.
Come 10 years my vagina won't look like this. I must cherish it
He looked me straight in the eye when he was fingering me last night...it was very serial killer.
Sorry I kept grabbing your vagina at the casino. I believed it was my lucky unicorn to win bonuses
why is there a fishing net hanging from my ceiling fan?
I said geronimo as I came I'm not sure if he appreciated the doctor who reference or was just confused
after he went down on me he said he wanted an air freshener for his car scented like my vag. i cant even.
You know I'm having a rough day when I'm curled up in the corner eating Spaghettios.
I was wondering why are people staring at me til I realized I was bra-less with a lei around my neck
I'm so high right now that I'm wearing gloves.
I love waking up to reeses ice cream. But I DONT love waking up to it all over my cat. I blame you.
It took like and hour to get him in me and then he came in like 2min. Size aint everything
I kinda just want to steal him and keep him forever
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