Dude that chick in the corner just threw up
Hot
if sarah has 12 dollars and spends 6 of it on cheap booze how much will she spend on hangover food the next morning?
4 on the dollar menu at mcdonalds
mom cant say that college never taught us math
you don't understand, he speaks spanish and is tall. i have to do him.
She's yelling about threesomes and realllly wants you to come over. Put the pieces together.
some guy had a sword and everyones crying..it turned bad..fast.
I know he'd never cheat on me. It'd be like choosing Mexican tap water over Patron.
All in all only spent $2 at the bar ln... Fucking love having a vagina
His water bottle is sitting on my coffee table like a monolith dedicated to the things he is not doing to my vagina.
after attempting to eat a candy cane bigger than my hand i have determined there's no way to eat this that doesn't seem erotic
I'm going to get high and eat ice cream until the pain goes away. You're welcome to join.
We drank vodka and koolaid through a traffic cone. It got rowdy.
I love everything about him! His penis, his hair, his tattoos, his penis, his cat, his penis.
If you binge watch Bill Nye Saves the World without me you can consider yourself single
What happened last night dude?
YOU SHIT ON MY FUCKING COFFE TABLE THATS WHAT FUCKING HAPPENED!!!
Got my period and a UTI on the same day. Fuck you, Sunday.
Randomize