It doesn't have to be a walk of shame...just pretend he took you to breakfast.
No one shows this much boob at breakfast
yeah, we don't understand. the wings losing for guys is like girls finding objects in their body..just weird and sad
Why is there a living, breathing cow on your front porch?
Did i throw a brick at someone last night?
is there a legit reason for the weird voicemail I got at 2:14am?all I could make out was 'help me' 'two hours' and 'toilet butt'. wtf did u drink.
It got awkward when the girl working at planned parenthood continued to hit on me, after she knew about my STDs.
I'm really hoping to find some quality strange ass tonight while at my court appearance.
Tell me again your tentative move date. There are 5 Russians in my apartment on ecstasy and they are having a rave in my living room. I can't. I need to move stat
I'm texting you the word "cockring" because I feel it hasn't been said enough throughout our friendship.
Also, you should've bet on Team Liver.
We won.
USA USA USA
HE BEAT A GUY WITH NOTHING BUT RAZZLE DAZZLE AND HIS FABULOUSNESS
She kept giving the uber driving directions and we all thought they were wrong so we'd send him the other way. Turns out she wasn't guiding us home, but to the half gallon that she hid in the bushes on the way to the bar.
I'm a grown ass woman. Treat me like one. Fuckboy
He's going to be in the air guitar championships in june. Need I say more.
Answered a bio test question bc of watching phineas and ferb. Remind me to always drink when studying.
Randomize
