fun fact: cucumber in vinegar with pepper = best ever high snack
There's a group of australian girls next to me. can't take them seriously. think they are going to turn into mr g
it glows. i had to have it.
Just got judged by the front desk clerk, 2 maids and a security guard at the Sheraton. I've decided to use this as a character building experience.
I can't believe all the places I got into shoeless last night. Apparently no one will say no to a girl covered in paint with a ripped shirt
Puuuub goooolf. Being trashed at 830 never felt so right
Dude what hole are you on?....and its 9:15
hole5. 2 under par. irish nachos
Did you just reference Ludacris during my possible pregnancy scare of 2012?!
I messaged him asking for his address. He replied with the address then said, "If you're gonna stalk me, I'm the third window on the side and usually get naked around 8am and anytime randomly after 6pm (listen for music).. If you're sending anthrax, I'm 6'2" 225lbs so send a good amount."
I can't help that I bring out the sex in people
I call him Seabiscuit because he's my trusty steed
Being hungover in this office is the actual worst. Like they look at me and know I was wasted at 1 am, karaokeing Billy Idol at a gay bar.
So is it weird that I am super excited for my new captain america clit ring... Or is my crotch getting too patriotic
You don't know bruises until you've been banged by 3 drunk bagpipers in the back of thier bus
just turned another straight guy gay. Goddamn the church must hate me
So I lost my dignity between the strip club and your penis...
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