I love you. And by the way. I found out a way for you to train your gag reflex. Elliot taught us in math.
He looks like Ryan Reynolds from this angle
Since when is drunk an angle?
Just orgasmed in traffic. Starting to have feelings for my commute.
He kept pouting and saying i cockblocked him and I kept yelling "I'm sorry...but the cock was never out to be blocked"
A pack of naked men just sprinted down the street screaming in German. It's 5 AM.
I liked a picture of him with his pants around his ankles, if that doesn't say I'm into you, I don't know what does.
I keep telling myself that if Britney can make it through 2007, I can make it through this date.
I suppose I should wish you a happy one year of bumping uglies
There is a dude in a thong with a Nerf axe having battles in the street. Welcome to Portland
Her family was right next to mine during christmas eve mass. Between the terrifying glares and her trying to set my sleeve on fire during the candle part I am VERY sure she knows im fucking her ex...
rollerskate sex sounded like a good idea...
I just remembered that we had an in-depth conversation about how it was too stressful to wear pants.
Do you think I need to report to HR that the intern and I had butt sex?
yeah, my mom got it for me because it had animals AND alcohol.
Sorry I fucked your cousin. Again. I just wanted him to take me on his boat.
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